See? Ahahaha LOL :) :*

Remember you...

This diary was written by me some days ago. But I dont have time to post it here. So now I posted it here :)

Monday, 24th Sept 2012

I woke up this morning and crying out loud :'( I remember you last night and made me dream about you. For the time before this, every dreams that I dreamed about you were always a precious dream. But for now, I guess I'll call it as nightmare --'
Actually I'm not ready for sure to move on. I dont know whvo would be the person who can makes me move on for sure. I've no guy to love because there's no one like you. You're special for me. I lied for saying that I'll find someone other to love.
Now I've decided to move on. No, letting go, I mean. I really confused about my decision. Is it too quick? Or maybe too late? Whatever! I will move on!
Actually I dont wanna be someone who walks away so easily. But I'm too far for loving you. Theres bo future on you. I cant do this for long time while you never reply my love. How is the way they'll call me? A girl that suspended by a boy like you? Huh?! I wont, anyway! So, this is the time for me to letting go.
But how? I've no way to let this feeling go on..
God, please help me. I wont love him anymore. I wont disturb his live anymore. I wont wasting my time. I wanna be like those girls! Loving someone who loves them so.
God, I have so many wishes when I start loving him. And none of them came true.. Is it fair for me? :'( :'( :'(

Hard To move on.

It's been about a year since that feeling came to me. This feeling appear just like the shadow appear when the light is turn on. I dont know how I define this feeling.. I just know that I care too much to you even u dont know who I am and I just know u as ur name called. No others that I know from you except your name.
I know you since I was at JHS. But this feeling start makes me confused when I was at SHS. I cant lie that the shadow of your face always appear where ever I am, whenever I'm, and whoever I'm herewith. I care too much and I realized that I love you..
I told you my feeling. No respons from you. First, I want you to be my boy. And it's my desire for long but I then realized that I love you sincerely. So I guess that you dont have to be my boyfriend. I just wanna have friendship with u, but still there's no response.
I thought to move on. And I start to do it. But it's really hard. And this feeling is too sweet to forget :'( It's really complicated.
I know that you dont love me, very different with me, here, really love you. How could I spend my live without thinking of you?
I start to love someone other and I'm trying to accept other guy's love who I think would replace you in my heart. Time past by, and I couldnt love that guy :( I'm wrong for thinking that I can forget you!
Day changed by another day and I found myself still loving you. How could I do? Everything that I do reminds me of you.
I feel more confused. Actually, what makes me love you? What makes me difficult to forget u? What makes me always thinking about u?? Oh My God, I just realized that now I'm in SINCERE LOVE! That's the reason that I really love u!
Now I've decided for not moving on. I won't! I wont give up loving u because at the end, the only thing that really matter is to feel loved and loving.
Wait, loved? Oh yeah, actually one of my wish is u'll love me for who I am. But nevermind if u won't reply my love cause I love u sincerely, even it's hard and so sick to realized :'(
Everynight I prayed to God for save u. I asked God to tell u that I really love u. And still no response. I feel so sick. I'm afraid to come to school because Im afraid meeting u :'( I wont see ur face because Im afraid for loving u more.
Month changed by another month and I found myself still waiting for u :(
I'm trying to be wise and forget u, but what about my promised some times ago? Ok, then, fixed, I will waiting for u!
Some days ago, my friends told me that u have a relationship with a girl. So sick to know it, but I've to face it, even Im crying and my tears run down everytime :'( :'( :'(
Year changed by another year and now, I realized that it's been so long since I found a boy who makes me feel more passions, makes me feel loving some1 sincerely, and makes me know feel of broken heart </3
Dear Fs.,
God knows I'm working. I'm on my way forgetting you...